Xmas music ALREADY???

A week before Thanksgiving, and it's already full-blast with the holiday toonz. Yikes! This has just been a helluva year, but still I'm thankful that it hasn't been as bad as some other people had to experience.

Marty nearly died in January -- but right now, he's cranking guitar along with ZZ Top in his office. And he's working just about nonstop with Kaiser Permanente on a boatload of projects. Thank god for that. And that he's still here, and healthy.

Brenna moved to Florida with David. Now she's a sometimes-voice on the phone, a sometimes-email, and twice I've chatted with her on video. I HATE this "growing up" stuff. But she's doing okay there.

Ayla now has both drivers license AND car. AND is 18, an official adult (though still a kid in my book).

Me? I was not about to finish out the year without accomplishing a couple of goals:

I'm now a student at CSU Global, so far with an A-average.

And I'm working out regularly with a trainer, four days a week.

Job's still going, but it's been a horrible year in the financial industry. But the job IS still there, even if it's been mostly a boring year. But that's why it's so important to have other goals, other things to keep me going! The job gets the lion's share of my time each week, but unless something changes radically with it (which I am sure isn't in the cards) it's predictable and not terribly challenging. so I need to create my challenges elsewhere.

And I guess that's healthy, right? No need to look at my job being "everything" -- that's not normal. So I guess I'm moving toward being more healthy!

Onward and upward.

Monday, she DRIVES

Monday is A's driving test. Yikes. My last kid with a drivers license. This is very, very hard for me to bear. Sure, I'm happy for her... but I don't want to see her grow up and drive away like her sister. That's just too much.

I'm starting to understand what that term "empty nest" really means. And I don't like it.

When happiness hits you hard

This marks Week Three of my daughter's senior year of high school. So far, she's holding an A average. This is the kid who couldn't be bothered to even GET to school in the past, let alone to care about getting good grades. What a miraculous transformation it's been.

Both my daughters are just delighting me as they grow up. It HURTS to see them separate and become independent, hurts so bad. But I am just unbelieveably proud of them both.

Daughter B just moved to Florida. Daughter A gets her drivers license in (GASP) THREE DAYS. I simply cannot fathom this.

I hate that they're growing up.

I wish I still had the two of them, small and sweet, B clutching her treasured Ernie doll, and A with her little, four-tooth grin from a high chair. Oh, my girls, my treasures! Seeing you grow up has been hard on me. I want my little ones back -- but at the same time, I am bursting with joy over the beautiful young women you are becoming.

What a confusing time. I am so happy that it hurts. Never saw THAT coming.

finally the tomatoes turn red

Back in May, I planted a bunch of tomatoes. "Matures in 50 - 60 days" said the tags. So it's finally August, and we're starting to see some ripe ones. And they're wonderful.

Funny how long it can take "50 days" to go by -- more like a few months!

HIPPA matters, does it not?

OK, so there's this thing called HIPPA, the Health Information Privacy Protection Act. It means that if you're a medical provider, and you receive information from a patient, that you have to keep it CONFIDENTIAL. And yet, the other day I saw a practitioner that was covered by my insurance -- she had managed to "lose" my insurance card copy, and needed it again. And, she acted like it wasn't a big deal... but to me, it was! My insurance card holds info on my entire family -- and "losing" that breaks all the rules.

I think I need to let my insurance company know.

Sick violation

What do you do when a person you thought was a good person, turns out to be a soul-less sociopath? How do you cope with that? I'm struggling with it, and it still just stuns me that someone I thought was a normal, decent, responsible person was instead a criminal. And that that person decided to steal my signature as "their own" to get money. It's just... difficult to believe, but it's true.

What will happen to this person? Prison looms, it will be a life-changing experience for them. PRISON. Federal prison! YEARS behind bars, all for... money.

Sigh. Money is NOT the most important thing in life!!!!! It just makes me sad to think that someone I saw day-to-day, face-to-face, could be such a crook, and all for... money.

I am so thankful that I am not that kind of person. And I look forward to seeing that person get their just deserts.

Live out loud, because there's no such thing as privacy any more

(And if you think there IS, you're probably old, or a tribal nomad.)

I had a conversation with a coworker today, who gleefully told me about an issue that's cropped up at his alma mater, Univ. of Northern Colorado. Seems one of his UNC profs has been charged with some sort of "sexual misconduct" -- and he said that within about 24 hours, it was all over Facebook, and all his old buds from college who knew the prof were hooting about it. The story's here.

So, what's the point? Simple: that no matter who you are or what you do, nowadays you have to just assume that if you do something assinine, it WILL get out, and it will probably get our like wildfire once it hits Facebook. Especially if you have people anywhere in your "seven levels of connection" who are regular Facebook users.

So, if you do something stupid, or something illegal -- it WILL catch up with you. There is no stopping it.

Makes you wonder how "image managers" of the next century are going to work!

I am waiting and hoping to see a story break on Facebook, and I will watch with joy when it does.

Weird dreams about work

Given that things have just been WEIRD and UNSETTLING recently, I guess it's no wonder that I'm having trouble sleeping. My dreams have morphed with people from my current life, to scenarios from my previous life... putting, say, people I work with now into the situation where I was working or living ten or more years ago. THAT's strange. I'm sure a lot of this is simply because I spend so much time with coworkers, that they'd naturally appear in my dreams (and at least they're not nightmares!)

Growing veggies

I've got tomatoes, basil, Japanese eggplant, and three types of peppers growing in the back yard. So far, I don't have high hopes for the eggplant -- it looks like there are a whopping three blossoms going. The tomatoes are looking pretty good, including the hanging "topsy turvy" one I got for Mother's Day, where the plant grows out of the bottom of a hanging container, and then grows upward. It's very strange, but looks like it has a lot of fruit.

Stephen Covey talks about the law of the farm -- that you cannot throw corn seeds in the ground, and expect to sow an abundant crop the next day. It takes patience, much toil, nutrients, and time. We all need that, don't we?

I've been in analogy-mode this week, thinking about what it takes to learn and master new skills. I'm studying Spanish. It's frustrating and awkward to speak this new language -- it slows me down, I have to take baby steps, but I know that if I continue to apply myself, eventually I will become fluent.

That's the ticket -- time, attention, and much toil, to get what you want.

****THINGS I DON'T WANT TO FORGET I REALLY LIKE***

Last night I walked into the family room, and found Ayla watching the movie "Cool Runnings". I stood there a minute, and it hit me how much I really like that film, and that I had not thought about it in at least five years.

Ayla said, "I remember seeing this over and over when I was, like, nine." -- that's because it was one of the movies I had in my fairly small video library. But yeah, she did watch it a bunch, because I had it on. I loved the story of gumption and redemption, and success in the face of defeat. And, the music made me happy.

So -- I want to start a list of things that I just plain LIKE, so I don't go another five years before I suddenly remember I like them. And if it's a long list, I don't care.

At first, I thought I'd just publish it here -- but on second thought, I think I'm going to be more organized than that, and start a spreadsheet that I'll save to my Desktop for this. And, if at some point, I want to share some of the list, fine.

But for now, it's mine.